He's Moved Out (ok, well up)

We're separated. Sort of. The last few weeks have been a holy nightmare. Truely, I don't know where to begin, so I'll start with the end result. We are no longer sharing a bedroom. My husband has moved upstairs to live in the portion of the house that we are doing construction on. No interior walls, holes in the floor, the whole nine yards. But I couldn't take sleeping next to him every night.

So we're separated, b ut living in the same house. The thing that I've heard about from so many people, and have always thought was the stupidest possible thing on the face of the planet! And this is where my life has landed me. So now what? We go about our lives, taking our children to school and activities, while living separate lives. I hate it. And I need it. I want him. And I know I can't live with him. Could this be more confusing? Probably, so I won't challenge it, but I don't want to know how.

The Deception Continues

OK, so I found a stash of porn he had hidden in the closet. WTF? He's been in recovery since July, supposedly, so what is this? He claims he found it and had intended to get rid of it. So why didn't he get rid of it? So why didn't he say 'you'll never guess what I found in the closet... I just wanted to let you know so that there were no secrets.' Come on. It's really not that difficult to be honest, is it? What's the point in lying about all these stupid, rediculous things? I just don't understand it.
So I told him he had to find another place to stay last night. And he respected that. I'm planning to take the kids and go away for the weekend now. I won't have to see him again until monday, if all goes as planned (Ior maybe Sunday Night) but I just really need some time to figure out what to do next. I HATE THIS! Who needs this kind of constant drama in their lives? It's sucking the air out of me. I feel like all I do is work, take care of the kids, and deal with his shit. I haven't actually called a friend in months. This isn't something I can talk to my friends about. There's only a small group of people that have any kind of clue what dealing with this is like. I am lucky to have some of those people around me, though. At least I have people I can process this with. I am also so fortunate that I have an unbelievably supportive mother and sister. Thank GOD for them!